A few weeks ago, to promote the release of Batman Begins, some ad agency put up a city-block-long billboard up across the street from my apartment. It's gigantic. Literally, it stretches across an entire city block:

View of the Block 
Besides the fact that it destroys our view and prevents me from seeing if anyone is working in the offices across the street (which determines whether I should close my blinds while I do naked yoga), the fact is that there's a huge Batman head looking in my window. It's chilling.
Skeptical? Imagine this: there you are working on your computer, spending a perfectly nice evening shopping on Amazon.com for the latest Ben Folds CD and perhaps a new spatula, when-- HOLY SCARY PEEPING TOM! BATMAN IS LOOKING THROUGH MY FUCKING WINDOW!!!
It's not funny. Granted, you get used to the billboard's intrusive presence. But around dusk things get darker, and your pupils begin to dilate thus narrowing your peripheral vision (and the level of detail in what you still can see). And there's still that brief moment between first seeing the silhouette of a head looking in your window and recognizing that it's just a picture of Christian Bale.
And I'll be damned if that brief moment doesn't cause me to soil myself.
Sometimes I want to sneak over there and spray paint the whole billboard black, but the sense of irony that Batman's presence forced me into a life of crime is so overwhelming that I return to searching for the elusive spatula on Amazon.
Blast you, Batman! You'll rue the day you crossed me! Muah ha ha ha!!! MUAH HA HA HA!!!!


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